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February 2012

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Chapter One: The Melody of Love's Refrain


You take a deep breath and let everything out: the negative, and in some cases the positive.
You smile and think, "Everything is okay, I feel good." You go off on a happy tangent, listen to some upbeat songs and seemingly go about your day.

Then, somewhere throughout the day whatever feeling that kept you going disappears. Your feelings overwhelm you like the wave that overcomes a surfer. You take a moment to sit down and stare blankly at the wall.

There comes a point in life where you completely breakdown and you go through a great struggle just to keep yourself together. 

In my case, I started thinking..

I feel like I'm fighting to stay alive. Well to put it into better words..I'm fighting to sustain my sanity. Because if I let go for one second, I will fall apart. And it's hard. It's painfully difficult..all these questions filter through your mind.

What could have I done ? Or done better? Why is everything falling apart like this now? What will happen in the future ? Why am I so scared? Why can't I make this easier for myself? When will this be over?

Everyday these questions fill my mind and I lose all the strength that I held within me.

This is one of the absolute lowest moments of your life. No matter what people go through, we all share this universal sadness.This is the point where people want to escape and desperately find ways to ease the pain.

And I say NO to that method of dealing with your emotions and situation.

Face it head on. Use the pain as a mechanism to find your strength.

Easier said than done. Yes, I am quite aware of that.

Do not get lost in the cycle of whatever you are in. Find yourself.

Its hopeless, It's difficult, It's complicated.

I know.

You have to fight through the worst sometimes to see the best.
Never believe that a situation that happens in your life will make things permanent.
You are in control of that. You have the power to change your life. Give yourself that power.

Be strong and courageous, stay centered and focus on what you want for yourself.